As a person of faith, I have a quiet time every day in which I journal the reading of the day. The Book of Proverbs is one of my favorite books to journal about. It is full of wisdom and practical steps. For example, Proverbs 15:4 says, “The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” This proverb paints a powerful contrast: our words can either give life or quietly destroy it. In just one sentence, we’re reminded that the tongue holds incredible influence over the emotional and spiritual health of others. Here are three practical takeaways we can live out daily.
- Choose words that heal, not just words that are true.
My kids and I used to watch a movie called, “Anne of Green Gables.” In it there’s an older woman who blurts out whatever she thinks, regardless of who it hurts. When there’s push back, she just responds, “I’m known in this town as a woman who speaks her mind. You mustn’t mind me.” It’s easy to justify harshness by saying, “I’m just being honest.” But this verse challenges us to go further. Healing words are not only truthful—they are thoughtful, timely, and kind. Before speaking, ask: Will this build up or tear down? The same truth can be delivered in a way that restores rather than wounds. Tone, timing, and intention matter just as much as content. - Recognize the lasting impact of your words.
A “tree of life” is not temporary—it grows, provides shade, bears fruit, and sustains life over time. In the same way, encouraging words can stay with someone for years. On the other hand, deceitful or careless words can “crush the spirit,” leaving deep and lasting damage. This reminds us that everyday conversations—at home, with friends, with our children—are opportunities to plant something that will grow. What we say today may shape someone’s confidence, identity, or hope tomorrow. - Practice integrity in speech.
A deceitful tongue doesn’t only mean lying—it includes exaggeration, manipulation, gossip, or saying one thing while meaning another. Integrity in our words builds trust and safety in relationships. When people know our words are honest and consistent, our voice becomes a source of life. But when our words are unreliable, they create confusion and hurt. Practically, this means being mindful of what we repeat, resisting the urge to speak out of emotion, and aligning our words with truth and love. A very good practice that helps me is asking myself, “How would I feel if someone spoke to me that way? Or if someone told me what I’m about to say?”
In a world where words are constant and often careless, Proverbs 15:4 calls us to something higher. Every conversation is a choice: to be a source of life or a source of harm. When we stop to consider our words and have empathy for the person we are speaking to, we have the opportunity to bring healing and life…because our words do have power.